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All Forums >> [Casual Banter] >> Polls and Other Random Stupidity >> DUMB INTRO's Page: [1]
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DUMB INTRO's - 2/28/2006 5:59:36 PM   
KnightofMists


Posts: 823
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline 		Well... it is a common thing in the on line environment for many (particularly females) to receive the stupid emails of interest. Sometimes these emails just piss a person off, sometimes they just annoy you. But, other times you just can't help but laugh at how stupid it is. Makes you wonder if the person is brain dead sometimes...

anyways... what are the some of the stupid one you have received... and what was your smart ass response! *G*

my girl kyra just had this one

quote:

Looking for my slave. I hope your interested. Let me know.


and her quick response

quote:

I don't have her. When I lose something I usually go back to the last place I remember having it. Maybe you should start there.

Hope that helps.




_____________________________

Knight of Mists
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: DUMB INTRO's - 2/28/2006 6:18:33 PM   
KatyLied


Posts: 1512
Joined: 2/24/2005
From: Pennsylvania
Status: offline 		My favorite to date:


I spank and fuck your ass.


(I wish I were joking.)

_____________________________

Will you show me something that nobody else has seen?
- R.E.M.

(in reply to KnightofMists)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: DUMB INTRO's - 2/28/2006 7:33:34 PM   
denika


Posts: 58
Joined: 8/30/2005
Status: offline 		I have gotten a few winners in the past, ( I love kyra's responce to that email! bet he didn't email back *s*)

So far the worst ones have to be the phonicilly gifted the two best are:

R U HrnE... ya, okay like anyone would respond positive to that, I suggested he get a dictionary

and the all time classic

do you fuck... 'yes but not you' was my responce.



denika

(in reply to KnightofMists)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: DUMB INTRO's - 2/28/2006 7:50:27 PM   
maybemaybenot


Posts: 212
Joined: 9/22/2005
Status: offline 		my favorite one read exactly like this :

52yomBostonma

my reply was : sorry, I'm not very good at word scrambles.

Moments later came : 52 year old male from Boston, Mass.


my reply : and



I haven't heard from him since.

mbmbn


_____________________________

There are things that we don't want to happen but have to accept, things we don't want to know but have to learn, and people we can't live without but have to let go.

(in reply to denika)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: DUMB INTRO's - 2/28/2006 10:21:27 PM   
FelinePersuasion


Posts: 1727
Joined: 11/20/2004
Status: offline 		nice kitty do you play.


wow nice boobs how far from LA are you

(in reply to maybemaybenot)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: DUMB INTRO's - 2/28/2006 10:48:36 PM   
Aileen68


Posts: 798
Joined: 8/2/2005
From: New Jersey
Status: offline 		My favorite one was when a dom emailed me and asked me
"Do you want to be bread?"
Yes it was spelled that way.
So I replied...whole wheat or white?
Still makes me chuckle.
And he never answered me. I wonder why.

_____________________________

You're just as cool as a bug.

(in reply to KnightofMists)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: DUMB INTRO's - 2/28/2006 10:49:18 PM   
BitaTruble


Posts: 703
Joined: 1/12/2006
Status: offline
quote:

what are the some of the stupid one you have received...


Within the last two days I've been invited to several different places.

"Wanna come to Florida so we can get to know each other better?"

This a first email from a complete stranger who, of course, I don't know at all! I declined his invitation and he wrote me back a very nice note saying it was my choice, but the offer was still open. I had, of course, to respond and say it was not my choice, but rather the choice of Master and he should feel free to write and see if the invitation would be accepted. Himself did not receive the request. Guess he didn't really want to get to know me after all. ::chuckles::

And this invitation from an some guy in either Egypt or Asia.. I'm still confused as to where he resides. lol

'Slut! On your knees. You WILL worship my cock and feet!' ::paraphrased here because there was soooooo much more to it, but that was the gist::

What's funny about this one is the profile says his weight is 300 pounds and the picture he sent me of his legs and feet looked like they belonged to someone who did weigh 300 pounds, but the cock shot was a hard body and tanned 6 pack .. I'd guess the weight to be maybe 160 or so. The legs.. blinding weight and super hairy just didn't match that hard body at all!

I asked him to write to Himself and see if I was for sale, so the guy writes me back and I swear I could actually hear the whine through the typing..

"So, pig, you wanna serve me or not?"

::blinks:: I choose the.. 'or not'.. but um.. worded it a bit differently. ;)

Celeste




< Message edited by BitaTruble -- 2/28/2006 10:50:02 PM >

_____________________________

I wasn't there. I didn't do it. Nobody saw me do it. I wanna lawyer!

(in reply to KnightofMists)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: DUMB INTRO's - 3/1/2006 4:00:19 AM   
RavenMuse


Posts: 681
Joined: 1/23/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: KnightofMists
quote:

Looking for my slave. I hope your interested. Let me know.


and her quick response

quote:

I don't have her. When I lose something I usually go back to the last place I remember having it. Maybe you should start there.

Hope that helps.



I'd have suggested he checks down the back of the sofa!

_____________________________

This above all: to thine own self be true,
And it must follow, as the night the day,
Thou canst not then be false to any man.

(in reply to KnightofMists)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: DUMB INTRO's - 3/1/2006 5:50:56 AM   
IrishMist


Posts: 1767
Joined: 11/17/2005
From: Indiana
Status: offline 		Hmm my most recent one was a couple emails that went back and forth...written to me by a man whose profile said that he was a Master of more than 20 years.

Him: Hello
My response: ?????
Him: How are you?
My response: I am fine, how are you.
Him: I am fine.
My response: Is there a particular reason for you writing?
Him: I want to be yours.
My response: Hmm, very interesting to know. Tell me though, why would you want to be mine?
Him: So that you will serve me
My response:
/scratches head in confusion
You just said that you wanted to be mine though
Him: Yes, so that you will serve me
My response: But, if you are mine, would that not mean that YOU would have to serve me?
Him: No. Stop asking questions
My response: but if I don't ask questions, how will I know what is going on?
Him: I will tell you what you need to know
Him: Where did you go?
Him: Are you still there?
Him: Answer me bitch
Him: Fuck you then




_____________________________

"I love this crazy, tragic, sometimes almost magic, awful, beautiful life"
Daryl Worley

(in reply to KnightofMists)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: DUMB INTRO's - 3/1/2006 7:27:17 AM   
KatyLied


Posts: 1512
Joined: 2/24/2005
From: Pennsylvania
Status: offline
quote:

Him: No. Stop asking questions
My response: but if I don't ask questions, how will I know what is going on?
Him: I will tell you what you need to know
Him: Where did you go?
Him: Are you still there?
Him: Answer me bitch


Too funny. There is so much of this nonsense out there.
When a Dom (?) I was talking to refused to exchanged pictures; I refused to talk to him on the phone. A few days later he made mention of me in his profile as being "afraid to talk to a real dominant". geez. I laughed.

_____________________________

Will you show me something that nobody else has seen?
- R.E.M.

(in reply to IrishMist)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: DUMB INTRO's - 3/1/2006 7:34:04 AM   
IrishMist


Posts: 1767
Joined: 11/17/2005
From: Indiana
Status: offline 		LMAO Katy. I had one once who with the first email wanted my phone number, and when I refused to give it, he accused me of being a fake, and then blocked me. Don't figure.

_____________________________

"I love this crazy, tragic, sometimes almost magic, awful, beautiful life"
Daryl Worley

(in reply to KatyLied)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: DUMB INTRO's - 3/1/2006 4:08:05 PM   
yourMissTress


Posts: 541
Joined: 6/14/2005
From: Nashville, TN
Status: offline
quote:

anyways... what are the some of the stupid one you have received... and what was your smart ass response! *G*



So many to chose from...

Best one:

"I bet you don't know how to handle a real slave, want to come find out? I am a no limits slave and I bet you don't have what it takes to make me cry and beg."

response: I may not have what it takes to make a no limits slave cry and beg...here's what I'd start with...100 lbs of chain, 4 cement blocks, a 24ft deep swimming pool and you


funny thing was he never got back to me. Now what do I do with the blocks?

_____________________________

-Tress


"If a woman has to tell you that she's a lady, chances are, she isn't."


(in reply to KnightofMists)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: DUMB INTRO's - 3/1/2006 7:58:09 PM   
Evanesce


Posts: 633
Joined: 9/14/2005
Status: offline 		I got one in my email today that was an exact, word for word, carbon copy of a 4-line email that same person sent me on January 22.

I thanked her for the instant replay. (ok, not really, but I should have)

_____________________________

Denise
the Kaptin's wench

(in reply to KnightofMists)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: DUMB INTRO's - 3/1/2006 8:00:02 PM   
champagnewishes


Posts: 493
Joined: 10/31/2005
From: Hollywood, CA
Status: offline
quote:

response: I may not have what it takes to make a no limits slave cry and beg...here's what I'd start with...100 lbs of chain, 4 cement blocks, a 24ft deep swimming pool and you


I blew soda out my nose on that one!

_____________________________

Now if you'll excuse me, I have a beam of light to catch.
~Prot

(in reply to yourMissTress)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: DUMB INTRO's - 3/1/2006 9:04:14 PM   
GoddessDustyGold


Posts: 1216
Joined: 4/11/2004
From: Arizona
Status: offline 		I get these a bit too often.
Received: "I can relocate immediately and and I want to be your slave."
Reply: "Ok! Email Me your flight number to Phoenix. I need you here by this weekend."

*sniff* I never hear from them again. Why? Why? Why?


_____________________________

Dusty
Please do not get caught in that place where you think you know. Zen
Don't put Me up on a pedestal if all you want to do is look up My skirt
http://www.nitetflirt.com/Dustygold Hypnosis available
http://www.geocities.com/goddessdustygold

(in reply to KnightofMists)
Profile   Post #: 15
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